Dear Deborah

Dear Deborah_Issue 4 2020

“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope” (Jeremiah 29:11).

Dear Deborah,

I’ll admit it—I do not like change. Just about the time I find my “groove,” change is there once again to greet me with not-soopen arms. But, like most people, I adapt and overcome.

However, a recent change due to a conference relocation has left me with more questions than answers. After being a nurse for almost 30 years, I cannot find work in our new town. While this has never been a problem, I suspect it is my age that has a lot to do with the issue.

For the first time ever, I am almost jealous of my husband. Anytime we move, he of course has an instant job because he is the new incoming pastor for the district. But now I feel lost without my career, and I’m struggling with how to proceed while exhibiting enthusiasm at our new church home.

I didn’t see this coming, and to be honest, I’m not my cheerful, bubbly self. My husband and adult children have dropped hints that maybe I need to talk to someone soon.

Really needing wisdom and direction,

Wandering Aimlessly




Dear Wandering Aimlessly,

Your situation is challenging but not impossible. Thankfully, it appears you have a good support system, which will be a blessing as you navigate the next steps. Depending on your situation, you might choose to call some Christian friends for encouragement, talk to another pastoral spouse whose advice you value, or make an appointment with a qualified counselor (especially if you may be depressed).

You can also be assured that God has the perfect plan for you and will reveal it right on time! Recently someone in a similar situation offered some suggestions that helped her find new purpose and meaning in her former career, plus she discovered she had some hidden talents. Below are some of those suggestions to implement during the waiting period.

• Review your résumé and polish it up.
• Explore your new town and look for opportunities to visit with people in the community while shopping or walking.
• Volunteer at various establishments in your new area.
• Take online courses to learn new skill sets and sharpen your educational baseline.
• Be open to broadening and expanding your horizons.
• Be prayerful that God has just the right employment opportunity for you!

Not only will the time go by faster, but your focus will be redirected, which will help you find purpose and direction. Also, the in-between time will allow you to get better acquainted with your new church family.

Make no mistake about it, God isn’t finished with you. He has multiple options that will be the perfect fit for you and your family. “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope” (Jeremiah 29:11).